Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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