oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Randomize
