Whoa!!! Accidentally took a dump in chick's bathroom at Red Robin. 1 hr for coast to be clear. Women's farts sound like geese taking last breath. Liars.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Randomize
