I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
Randomize
