Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Randomize
