If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
