On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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