good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Randomize
