i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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