KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Randomize
