worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Watching her eat just hurts me
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
My vagina is very pro this idea
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Randomize
