Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize
