Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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