i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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