this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
