Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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