Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Randomize