i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
