Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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