Sry I called you an 8
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
We need a shit load of segways right now
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
