I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
This show inspires me to have sex in space
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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