You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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