haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Randomize
