Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize