3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Randomize