i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
Randomize
