i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
