Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize