Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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