Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
Randomize
