I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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