so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
How's work?
Spinning.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Randomize
