I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Randomize