It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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