His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
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