i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
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