Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
We don't watch enough power rangers
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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