Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Randomize
