we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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