We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
