there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
organizing the empties. That sober.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
