The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
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