I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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