You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Randomize
