i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
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