Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
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