sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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