Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
