Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I could make wine with my vomit
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Randomize
