let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Randomize
