It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
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