Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize
